Girls are stupid. Every one of them.

There has to be an alternative. Girls are, how do I say this nicely..... retarded. Apparently being with someone who has a kid and is a total loser is better than being with me. Go figure. But I have to see it as good. Why would I want to be with someone who would make that kind of decision? Exactly. So I'm considering the alternative. My mom suggested priesthood. I didn't have a response. So I just gave her a look and moved on. Not a big fan of priests and priests are not really big fans of me. Can you see me with a priest outfit and a mohawk? Using church money to go to Marilyn Manson concerts. Ha! Nikki suggested I turn gay. I think she just really wants a gay best friend. Not only am I so not in to that, but gay men have 1000 times more drama than girls do. Trust me. I've witnessed the bitch fights. While they are extremely entertaining to watch, there is no way I would want to be involved. So until I find an alternative, I'm going to focus all my energy on myself. Moving on! I'm going to work on my act. And I'm going to add on to my "asshole" joke. The basic premise of it being that girls only want to be with guys who are assholes. So my new plan of action is to go to a bar and see a girl standing there. Say hi. She'll ignore me like usual. Then I'm just going to punch her in the face.