Why Glee Makes Me Cringe

Let me start off by stating a few facts before you start sending me any hate mail. I've seen every episode of Glee since they did that little preview where they played the pilot months before the show started. I loved it. I was hooked. I haven't missed an episode since. Another fact is that I'm straight and I voluntarily watch this show on my own. I don't have a girlfriend making me do it. I don't tell a lot of people that I watch the show, for obvious reasons. But I am a fan of pop culture and I love to absorb as much of it as I can.

Now we're moving on to the topic at hand. The show makes me cringe. There's a lot of reasons why. The biggest reason there is, has a name. The name is Will Schuester. I sound like Sue Sylvester saying this, but this guy is the worst. Both the character and the actor playing him, Matthew Morrison. The contradiction he brings to the table astounds me. How can a character be so corny and so cheesy, yet act like he's the hottest thing since sliced bread? I just don't get it! And then Matthew Morrison himself releases an album?! The audacity! If I have to hear his ridiculous rendition of Somewhere Over The Rainbow, I'm going to beat him over the head with his ironic ukelele. Ok sorry about that outburst, but I get so heated sometimes. The show recently had his character Will propose to his girlfriend Emma, played by Jayma Mays. Watching this proposal with all the students singing and doing synchronized swimming made me writhe in pain. I literally had to turn away because the cheese factor was through the roof! Wearing a white suit and diving in to a pool? You're lucky your girlfriend didn't go running for the hills. And asking your student Finn, played by Cory Monteith, to be your best man? Do you not have any friends your own age that you have to ask one of your students?! Granted, this guy is the same age as I am (29) and playing a high school student on TV, so believability has already flown out the window. Let's move on.

Speaking of Finn, since when did a guy who can't sing, dance or look good become the most popular kid in school? Next.

Artie. Poor Artie, the wheel-chaired nerd. Spoiler alert: The kid who plays him, Kevin McHale, can actually walk. The guy is a nerd, this is a fact. You can argue with me about it, but it's true. He's like a Will Schuester Jr. He's a big nerd who thinks his shiz don't stink. Guess what, it reeks. He walks around....sorry, rolls around the school acting like he's the big man on campus. If this were real life, nobody would be associating with him. High school is hard. Glee kids are not cool. I would be saying the same thing if he played a character without a handicap. True story, I was in Babies R Us with my cousin and the Safety Dance came on by Men Without Hats. Except it wasn't the actual version that we know and love. I said to my cousin, "This sounds like someone recorded a drunk person doing karaoke at a bad bar doing this song." About 3/4 of the way through it clicked. It was Artie.

Last but not least, another person that annoys me is Mike Chang, played by Harry Shum Jr. He's known as the Asian dancing guy. I think my problem with him is that yeah, he's a great dancer, but he does that thing that dancers do. While they're dancing, they're play acting or doing some sort of charades with their moves. All it is, is overacting. And I don't like it. Just dance. Don't try telling a story while you're doing it. We get it.

I'm going to end on a good note. I watch the show because there are a lot of characters that I love and their story lines. Kurt (Chris Colfer) is awesome. Him and Blaine (Darren Criss) need more screen time. Rachel (Lea Michele) does deserve more solos because she's a great singer and her character brings so much emotion to the stories. She just needs to dump that dead fish Finn. (Oh fish fin. I get it.) Sue (Jane Lynch) is the best thing that ever happened to the show. She needs more stories and more scenes making fun of Will Schuester. She says what I am saying already. Mercedes (Amber Riley) can sing. She can sing so well, girl can SAAANG! (That's slang for sing.) Puck (Mark Salling) is also my age (29). But he's cool and has a mohawk. I would like to see him on another show where he plays a cop or something. He just needs to beat people up and I would like to watch it. And last but not least, Brittany and Santana (Heather Morris and Naya Rivera). These two need a spin off of their own. If that happens, I will quit Glee cold turkey and move right on to them. I love them both so much and I love them more and more every time I see them.

Ok that's it. Bring on the hate mail.